Oh. My. Gosh.

Are you ready for more finds from the depths of the bowels of the basement? Are you ready for finds that involve cake? Cake with boobies?
Brace yourselves, and shield any kiddie’s eyes. No, seriously.
Imagine going through a box, pulling out prayer card after prayer card, and then suddenly, YOU SEE THIS:

Hey baby, nice armless legless torso!

Are those plungers?

Is that breast personalized with a mole?
Oh the horror.

I don’t even know which aspect of this cake is more terrible. The rubbery looking plunger nips? 70’s man about to take a bite? The MOLE which says, hey, not only is this cake lewd, it’s modeled after SOMEONE YOU KNOW WHO IS PROBABLY AT THIS PARTY! Or is it the “Happy Birthday DADDY” inscription? Yeah, that may be it.

About Claire

Absolutely Small is textile artist Claire Chambers. Claire Chambers is a crazy-pants artist/crafter who spends most of her time indoors, very near to Portland, Oregon. She likes making people laugh, chickens and pugs, and writing about herself in the third person. She is utterly obsessed with making things out of fabric.


  1. Swirlyarts says:

    It was the Happy Birthday Daddy that got me too!!

  2. Art Kitten says:

    oh my god, definitely the Happy Birthday Daddy, bizarre and hilarious!

  3. I'm thinking that the guy's name was "Paddy." I choose to think that, so as to be slightly less traumatized.

  4. submit to this STAT:


  5. pollyanna cowgirl says:

    Oh, Daddy.

  6. Absolutely Small says:

    Glad you're all enjoying it!


    I just learned a new way to surprise and disgust my daughter when she is an adult.

    Adams Bday cake this year will be a plunger nipple naked torso.

    Lots of pictures will have to happen.

    This post made me crack up!

  8. Funny!

  9. shopPOPKO says:

    when my dad turned 50, i was 10, and he got a cake like this. seriously. it really happens!

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